My Compassionate Friend

Several weeks ago, I received an email from a woman I have never met, Kim Fredrickson, a licensed mental health counselor in California. In her email, she said that she had found my articles on self-compassion and asked if I would read her recent book on self-compassion from a Christian perspective, “Give Yourself a Break: Turning Your Inner Critic Into a Compassionate Friend” and pass the book along to anyone that might benefit. Before responding to her request, I read through some of her articles and was deeply touched by her personal story, her courage, and how God is at work in her life. She was recently diagnosed with a terminal illness and has dedicated to live each day of the rest of her life as a testimony to God’s compassion, truth, and grace.

We began to email back and forth and found so much in common, especially a calling to share God’s compassion in a very personal way. Through Kim’s emails, I personally received words of encouragements and prayers over my transition into private practice. Even as I type, I feel so blessed and grateful that God brought Kim into my life as an encourager and mentor.

Last night, I received her new book in the mail and immediately read over half of it. It is wonderful. I was so excited this morning that I jumped out of bed to write this blog! Here is a little taste of a book packed with wisdom, words of grace, and practical ways to apply compassion:

“As children we’re taught to treat others the way we would like to be treated. But as adults, we often need to turn that old maxim around. We’re good at showing compassion to other people – but many of us have trouble showing that same compassion to ourselves.”

“Self-compassion is absolutely essential for healthy, balanced living. It provides huge benefits including emotional resiliency, stress reduction, contentment, and healthier relationships. Without it we are vulnerable to the opinions of others and find it difficult to deal with and let go of our mistakes. It is tough enough to go through a difficult situation, especially when we think we had a part in creating it. It is another kind of torture to never be able to let go of self-criticism and blame… God’s heart is tender toward us in our suffering, frailties, and mistakes. He is our perfect example of balancing truth and grace. He knows we are but dust and is merciful (Ps. 78:38-39).”

I am deeply grateful for my compassionate friend. She has ministered to me personally… and we have never even met. I am deeply grateful for her boldness and courage. I highly recommend her book for anyone who struggles with an inner critic and negative views of self.

I am grateful. God works in marvelous and mysterious ways.